Incidents that Instantly make a new place unappealing...

-someone falling down the stairs
-more than 4 people texting/talking on the phone
-skimpy dressed people
-spills that have yet to be cleaned up
-strong smell of urine
-a screaming child
-zero smiles
-a bell on the door as you enter and exit
-one of those "No shoes, no service" signs
-seeing some that reminds you of someone you despise
-hearing an unliked song on the radio
-when someone says hi (or waves), but is talking(waving) to the person behind you
-not being able to find a bathroom

Things Dogs can do that People shouldn't

-lick themselves in odd places
-drink from the toilet bowl
-roll in crap (and not be judged)
-stick their noses in people's crotches
-eat off the floor
-slobber on people
-stare for lengthy periods of time and not be considered creepy/violating
-fall asleep in a matter of seconds
-chew on a variety of items ex. socks, shoes
-be walked on a leash
-greet someone by jumping on them
-pee/poo in public
-bite/growl
-chase their tails

Things you shouldn't share on a first date

-possible childrens names
-your love for Japanese rock music
-you're confused about your sexuality
-live in your parents basement
-fear of commitment
-what level you are on in Dungeons and Dragons
-you have 23 cats
-criminal record
-kept your umbilical cord
-2nd date of the night (1st with this person)
-collect hair
-favorite things about your last boy/girlfriend
-love for anime
-therapist says you're a bad kisser
-personal record for days without a shower
-president of Harry Potter fan club
-you've seen Twilight more than 100 times
-your list of allergies/medical conditions
-how many friends you have on myspace/facebook
-"You remind me of my mom"
-constipated
-in a cult
-you believe in love at first sight
-that you're bored
-stole the clothes you're wearing
-waiter/waitress is hot
-speak vulcan
-have a wedgie
-just farted
-crashed everyone of your cars
-the bill

this list is a lot longer when it is typed out...ahaha

Things that are cute when little kids do them but adults really shouldn't

-talk in a baby voice to anyone but a baby
-wear pjs with feet
-suck on pacifiers
-carry a teddy or blanky (call them teddys or blankies to any one but a little kid)
-eat their boogers
-wear t-shirts with barney on it
-run around in their diapers
-watch sesame street regularly
-pretend like their gummy bears are being attacked by monsters and bite their heads off
-make airplane sounds as they direct their spoon to their mouth
-take bubble baths with the neighborhood kids
-eat playdough
-make mud pies

Places not to start looking for a husband

-graveyard
-monastery
-classified ads from the 70's
-Castro district
-GLBT parade
-prison
-insane asylum
-AA meeting
-hospice
-Backstreet Boys concert
-FBI most wanted list
-Star Trek convention
-wedding ring shop
-video game chat room
-married man's accountability group
-family reunion


I know some of these are offensive and not at all pc, sorry about that. (and you should know that there were others that i didnt post because they were even more uncomfortable)

Things you can do in Europe that you can't do in America

-pee on the side of the road in the middle of traffic
-wear man capris
-purchase an armful of groceries and be expected to carry them out with no bag
-pay to use a public restroom
-never wear deodorant and not have it be a big deal
-rock a mullet and be in style
-bring your dog anywhere with you
-be poor and still drive a BMW
-get a fully body tan at a beach
-pay four euro for a luke warm water
-recycle everything
-for no logical reason stand unnecessarily close to someone in line
-legally have an open container of alcohol in your cup holder
-blow by a cop and 100mph on the freeway
-be able to drink a beer but not drive a car
-stare at someone for minutes on end and not be considered rude-
-rock clothes you've been wearing since the 80's and never have gone out of fashion


so i realize it's been quite sometime since i last updated this, it's not that i stopped making lists, it's more that i just stopped sharing them, sometimes they are inappropriate, sometimes not very pc, and other times not very funny so it's hard to decide if i should post them but i'd like to be better about getting them on here. (lizzie want to join me?)

Places Not To Stay On Your Honeymoon

-Family reunion
-Working Farm
-Any NASCAR event
-Monastery
-Near an Aviary
-By the Railroad Tracks
-Home